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a weary world

Beats Antique has a new album out based on the Hero's Journey, called A Thousand Faces.  I haven't listened to much of it yet, but I'm definitely interested in it, since this was an album they Kickstarted.  Plus, over the summer, the troupe's Fringe show that I narrated was ALSO based on the Hero's Journey, so the coincidence of these things in pretty interesting to me.

Also out today is part one of the new Fables game, The Wolf Among Us. I really want to check it out, because in the past I've actually really enjoyed Telltale's brand of games.  But I'm not a huge fan of buying games like that one installment at a time.  I might wait a bit on it and then just watch people's reactions jealously.  :D

Yesterday, I was pulled into my manager's office with the preface of "I don't want you to feel weird about this", which of course meant I felt weird about it.  But, I've been told that (even though it's not blocked and they don't plan on blocking it), they want me not to go to Tumblr anymore when I'm at work.  This pretty much leaves me no personal outlet at work other than using my work email, which I've only given to two people.  Pretty much any webmail site is blocked, even the Tumblr inbox got caught by the blocking software every now and then.  I also can't get to my google drive, or any sort of site where I might be able to write anything is also blocked.  It's really frustrating.  I understand some of the levels of security to a point, but also just really, really frustrated by them.  I've taken to writing long-hand at work when I have the time, but it's harder to do.  I get lost easier when I'm writing by hand and have to stop a lot.  Plus, I just don't feel like I write as fast and I don't like having to type it all out again later either.  *grumbles*  It's just frustrating.  Really, I didn't so much mind being told not to use Tumblr - a lot of their security precautions make sense based on the type of company I'm working for now - I'm still just frustrated by how uncertain this job is, and how bored and underutilized I am there.

My boss keeps hinting at how she wants to keep me around, and how I'll be around after this new project/program launches, but that's never a certainty.  I've heard it before at contract jobs, and things don't always work out.  Not doing any report or development work is going to hurt if I have to look for a job again in six to nine months, if I can last that long without bashing my head against the keyboard from cleaning up spreadsheets all day every day.  BUT, I do like my manager, and I feel like if I did get to stick around long enough to be made an employee, that she'd probably help me figure out where else in the company I could work.  Or, maybe let me figure out how to work my way up to manager.  I haven't had a manager on my side in a long time and it feels nice, and not something I want to just give up for another contract job.

Ps.  Did anyone watch American Horror Story: Coven?  If not, and you're thinking about it?  MAJOR trigger warning for that first episode.  Just why does Ryan Murphy hate women so much?
I didn't watch OUAT: Wonderland yet, but I'm thinking about it.  Thoughts?

get lucky

So, I mentioned Outlander yesterday, right?  Looks like Starz has ordered 16 episodes of an Outlander television show for 2014.  Interesting.  I'm liking it so far, maybe the show will be good, Starz seems to be having some success lately.

Yuletide nominations have begun.  I'm very sad to discover that my lack of attention to the nomination process has meant that almost all the fandoms I wanted to nominate aren't on the list (Witchblade, Palimpsest, Little Red Riding Hood).  However, I think I found several fandoms to request that might give me the same type of story even if it's not LRRH.  I also found a ton of stuff I was willing to offer this year, and actually feel fairly confident writing about.  My Dear Yuletide Author letter is here.

I was also pleasantly surprised to find that the fake series inside Rainbow Rowell's Fangirl, the Simon Snow books were their own separate Yuletide nomination.  Since I like the idea of other media: bands, books, television shows, inside stories, this makes me pretty happy.  Especially since the novel I've been working on has a fake band in it.

Now, I hear there's some sort of book fair happening downstairs in our cafeteria, so that's where I'm headed.


a dark tornado

I keep saying I miss it here, although it's not the here as the use of this place the history that I miss.  I know that when I want to look up what books I was reading in 2006 and what I thought about them.  I miss that kind of journally business that I got out of when I fell into fandomy spaces.  Even my written journals are pretty sparse the last few years and it's not for lack of thoughts, just... time, I guess?  I've been trying to keep up with my written journals more (which are really less journalling and more to do & to done lists, book lists and writing notes) and I bought myself a mess of Keri Smith books for my birthday this year to get me more in the habit and interest of written notes.  (Books by Keri Smith I gifted myself with: Mess, Wreck this Journal, Finish this Book, the Non-Planner Datebook, How to Be an Explorer of the World... and one more I can't remember the name of at the moment.)

I also noticed about a month ago that my reading habits have gone WAY downhill.  It was September, and I'd finished one book, ONE BOOK for the whole previous nine months.  And that book SUCKED.  (Women in Love by DH Lawrence, if you care to know.)  I've since remedied that, diving into a couple of recommendations from a friend and activating my Audible account.  I've finished 8? books in the past month as a result.  I feel really good about that, not just the number, but I guess I've really sort of needed that escape of diving in to a few good books (and a few bad ones).

Books I've finished thus far (minus Women in Love) and a quick one or two line reviewCollapse )

Currently I'm listening to Outlander by Diana Gabaldon, reading Blue Blazes by Chuck Wendig and about to start Barrel Fever, another David Sedaris book.  I've heard a lot of mixed thoughts about Outlander, but my SIL gave me a strong recommendation for it, so I thought I'd try it and so far I'm liking it.  I might not talk about all the stuff I'm trying out here, but if you're on Goodreads, look me up.


In other news, it's the 7th of October, more than 2 months since the baby was born, and we have still not met him.  The kid has mentioned a few times she'd like to get together, but hasn't talked to me in about two weeks, and has ignored texts about meeting.  They have gotten together with Matt's parents a few times, so we've heard that the baby seems to be good.  I try not to think about it too much.  It's clear their intent is to hurt us with this, so I'm not letting it.  Two months in and it's getting easier to make that a true statement.

We are working towards renewing our Foster Care license, and maybe by next year we'll start taking in respite kids again.  Don't know that either are up for long-term care, or adoption again (at least not in the near future) but we've not given up on it completely.


This past weekend was a whirlwind.  We drove out to St. Louis Friday night.  I could not sleep at the hotel for some reason, ended up getting up at like 5:30am on 3 hours of sleep and finishing up Feed before getting breakfast.  Had second breakfast around 11am with Matt's family, and then met seimaisin for lunch and general hanging out times at 1:30pm.  Matt was a trooper, and drove all the way both times.  I should've taken the first shift Saturday night, but I had such a migraine, tried to take the second shift but didn't make it more than like 20 minutes because the road strobing was just making it hard to drive.  Spent a lazy Sunday catching up on TV, YouTube videos and video games.

DABB Mix: Your Kingdom Come (Dragon Age)

A fanmix for shadoedseptmbr's Dragon Age Big Bang fic, "This is My Kingdom Come".

Summary: In the wake of the Landsmeet, Alistair and Melisande Cousland struggle to come to grips with their decisions and duties and meet the Blight.

Tracklisting below the cutCollapse )
Download the mix from my site here(right click, save as, please)
Individual songs can be uploaded upon request
Listen here 8tracks)

DABB Mix: After (Dragon Age)

This is a fanmix I put together for aaya_sohma's Dragon Age Big Bang story, Fire and Lightning. I had a lot of fun with this mix, it even encouraged me to dip my toes into some digital painting. The backgrounds on the cover and back images: the parts with the sunsets, I painted those digitally and then of course edited the hell out of them to make them what they are now. But, I'm actually pretty proud of the look of those paintings without any editing. I may post them at some point, don't know.

From the story summary:
(Set almost a year after the events at the end of Dragon Age II and a couple months after the events in Asunder.)
The first of the guards reached her. She jumped back from his wild swing and raised her arms. She could. It would be so easy to give in. To be the monster everyone thought she already was…but, no. Go Away! She screamed at the tantalizing voices in her head. I’m not going to give in to you not now! Not EVER!

Anyway. I hope you enjoy the mix!

Tracklisting under the cutCollapse )

Download the mix from my site here (right click, save as, please)
Individual songs can be uploaded upon request
Story Title: In the Catalogue of Common Things
Pairing(s): Bethany Hawke / Teagan Guerrin
Major Characters: Bethany Hawke, Teagan Guerrin
(Also starring: Merrill, Carver Hawke and Cullen; offscreen: Isabela)
Rating: Mature / Explicit (Mature Story, Explicit Epilogue)
Warnings: drinking, age differences, devastatingly handsome and nerdy professors, offscreen: Varric and the Biancas
Artist #1: meagkhan
Artist #2: scarele

Summary: Modern Day AU. Professor Teagan Guerrin has a very set idea for how things in his life are supposed to be. Like the fact that his time to fall in love is long past. Bethany Hawke has been his TA for the last four years and now she’s about to graduate. Circumstances find both of them in the same bar one night two months before graduation, and long harbored attractions come to light.

Notes: I owe a huge debt of thanks to minorearth, who not only tackled the ginormous job of moderating the Dragon Age Big Bang for us, but also helped spawn my entire story idea. Without her, this story would not exist. She constantly fosters my love of Teagan and I owe her a lot more than this story for that. <3

I also want to thank my two wonderful artists: meagkhan and scarele who made such awesome things to go with this story. I know it’s not everyone’s idea of an adorable pairing and it means a lot that they chose me to art for.

Lastly, but not least, I want to thank my wonderful beta tklivory who spent a lot of time correcting all of my misplaced punctuation. I really appreciate all the hard work she put into making sure my story looked presentable today.

Link to the Story: Part One | Part Two
Link to Art by Meagkhan: [here] (NSFW)
Link to Art by Scarele: [here]

MEBB Mix: Hell's Hero (Mass Effect)

Fanmix for the story Turnaround by opalgirl28. I really wanted this story because of the topics it addresses. I listed the warnings from the author below because they're important. But, I think it's a fascinating story and I enjoyed mixing for it.

Warnings & Summary
Fic addresses mental illness and what kind of mental state Shepard might be in after ME3; I was writing from the perspective of Shepard. Nothing particularly graphic, but please heed this warning if you find mental illness/discussion of it/reading the reactions and thought processes of someone who is mentally ill triggering or otherwise upsetting.

Ada Shepard went into the final battle fully expecting to die, but when she wakes up in a military hospital on one of Jupiter's moons after a 'Destroy' ending, she has to come to terms with being alive in a post-Reaper world and face some of her old demons.

Tracklisting below the cutCollapse )

Download the mix from my site here (right click, save as, please)
Individual songs can be uploaded upon request

GenCon Plans

(xposted from Tumblr)Last year, we went to GenCon and I spent the majority of the convention in our hotel room, writing. Now, I had a good time, but it wasn't really a convention experience. Or it didn't feel like one. And then I came home and felt worse, not only because a lot of what was written got dropped pretty much immediately, but also because it sunk in how much I missed. If I had it to do again, I would've just separated myself for those days and thrown myself into GenCon.

So this year, that's what I'm doing. I don't care if I'm going to be on my own for a while, I'm signing up for all the seminars. I'm going to sit and listen to people talk about games and writing, and then I'm going to play some stuff, maybe watch a movie or two... take the kid to the masquerade ball. I plan on having a good time and making up for last year. I just added a bunch of stuff to my schedule, and a whole lot of other stuff to my wishlist for later review (and/or purchase). I think I might even enter a board game tournament. *nods*

Is anyone out there going to GENCON?! If you're going, I'd love to meet some people somewhere. Maybe play a game or two. XD

It's close now

So, I could bore you all with how long and stupid the past months have been regarding the whole, getting H adopted thing. Let's just say that the agency she came through us from has been a pain in the ass to deal with. Fortunately, in May, we were able to do two things that have helped speed up the process.

  1. We signed paperwork with SRS that basically terminated our foster care payments and made us almost officially her adoptive parents. When I say almost, I mean that she's able to use our last name now, but the court hasn't put stamp to paper to make it completely legal.

  2. We went to one of her court dates in BFE Kansas (It's a 7 & 1/2-ish hour drive from KC). Her workers weren't happy that we showed for one, but for two, it gave H the opportunity to voice some things the workers weren't doing, or had done wrong. I think this gave the workers a little impetus to work faster, because the judge- he wasn't happy.

I got word over email yesterday that all the paperwork is ready to be shipped to the attorney, and I think the attorney has 30 days? to get in contact with the court, and the court has 90 days? to set a date. Something like that.

So, it's coming soon now.

The other thing that's worth saying is that we're still delighted with how this has worked out, despite the agency setbacks. We celebrated her 16th birthday in May and in August, she'll have been with us a whole year. It's pretty awesome. To be honest, I still don't feel like a parent, if it's really supposed to feel like anything. What I feel is that I have an awesome kid at home, and that I already feel like she belongs to me, even if the state hasn't made that legal yet.

Truthfully we've had no issues with her that a normal parent wouldn't have with their kid. And I'd like to say maybe we're a little easier and more communicative with her and she with us than a lot of parents of teens are. To be certain, we talk about A LOT of things I know that Matt's or I's parents never, ever discussed or would've discussed with us as teenagers. It's something we have to do, to keep that communication open so that we all understand each other, but it's something that comes pretty easily to Matt and I. It's been good I think, all these months, because of that.

Anyway, if we're lucky, the whole attorney/court stuff will move quickly and it'll be over before she even starts school in the fall.

This is what I've been up to lately

Like video games? Make something or write something based on a video game? Then this is for you! { The Pixel Evolution } It's a fanzine for video gamers. The issue that's currently up is a mock-up, just an example of what future issues might look like. We're accepting submissions for the first official issue (with the theme of fairytales). Submissions need to be in by the 14th of July.

When I said I was spending time on Tumblr and doing fannish things... well, this is one of the many outcomes of my new fandom brain. I'm excited about it. I hope other people are too.

Long Overdue post-winter giftfic round-up

So, due to being sick and pretty much asleep for the majority of Yuletide sign-ups, I actually missed signing up as a writer.  But, like I have the past few years, I picked up a few pinch-hits and ended up writing two stories.  Neither in fandoms I've given a lot of thought to.  As with a lot of stuff I write that's outside my normal fandoms, I was super nervous to write these, and I'm still not completely happy with them.  But, I wrote them.

(All Story links go to AO3)

And then somehow (I didn't know they did this to be honest) I was able to sign-up to get a story anyway, because I picked up more than one pinch-hit.  Quel surprise! And then, I didn't get one, but SIX gifts, and I just was over-the-moon.  So, for your reading pleasure:

  • An Honest Mistake - Dragon Age [Isabela/Aveline] (a special treat for me by virusq because technically DA isn't a Yuletide fandom)
  • Purgatory - Carnivale [Henry & Management]

There's more, but let me first say that I've requested Little Red Riding Hood stories every year I've done fandom and I've been super impressed every year by what people come up with.  I got four LRRH stories this year and I love each of them.  You'll see by the tags, I have a type for LRRH stories and I think all of these are slightly smutty.

As for Dragon Age fandom, I wrote a few things for that (and one co-written piece) by far the longest of which is Of Wolves (which you might be tired of hearing about, but I'm not tired of talking about it - {see love of LRRH stories}

And I got some cool stuff too:

Happy Holidays and things

I've been sick through most of the holiday, which sucks. About Wednesday, I got whatever cold that H had last weekend, and went home from work after our group lunch. Since then, I've been pretty much dead, brain full of mush and at the moment, thought I'm only feeling a little bit better after 12 or so hours of sleep, I barely have a voice.

It's not the greatest way to spend the holiday, but I've muddled through, still seen all of my family and have gotten some cool things from my online friends and family. Even sick, this has probably been the best Christmas I've had in a long time. H, I think, also had a really good Christmas. She was surprised by her gifts from us, and even more surprised I think, that she got all the things she did from Matt and I's families. They've all welcomed her so much, I think she's still a little surprised by it all.

Anyway, wherever you are, however you celebrate, I hope it's a great holiday for you.

Things... progress

I've been meaning to write and update and then just keep not doing it. Not having access to anything other than email when I'm at work does limit my output a lot. And when I'm home, I'm mostly over on Tumblr, writing or playing a game. Plus you know, family time since we have a teenager in the house.

As far as adoption goes, it's slow - we've turned in the vast majority of the paperwork, which is mostly all repeat paperwork. But, since H comes from a different agency than the one we foster through they need their own set of everything. That said, the way our families have sort of embraced H has been really nice. We feel most day like she belongs to us already, and I think she does too. We took her around on Thanksgiving and she met more of each family and did really well everywhere. She's just good teenager and we're lucky to have her.

In fact, we had family pictures with Matt's parents and sister this past week and H was in them, she even took a picture on her own with Matt's parents and it's just... super sweet. There's a great picture of the three of us as well that is getting printed on a giant canvas so we can hang it in our house. I also got Christmas cards printed with the picture yesterday and will get them sent out this week.


If you feel so inclined, I put my name down on this year's holiday love meme here.

Even with the good stuff going on - like having H with us, or my job getting extended for the next three months (this is very good), or being proud of some of the writing I've done lately - I still am struggling a bit with old anxieties and insecurities that are resurfacing after a long time away. So a little love goes a long way for me right now.

Mix: One Step Closer (Dragon Age)

This is a fanmix I put together for tarysande. I did a little giveaway over on Tumblr a while back and she was one of the prize winners. She asked for something for f!Hawke/Sebastian and I was happy to oblige.

Also done as a companion to her stories here and here.

Tracklisting under the cutCollapse )

Download the mix from my site here (right click, save as, please)
Individual songs can be uploaded upon request

Enjoy, and let me know what you think if you download it. Thanks!

OFBB: Until You Belong To Me (Master Post)

Title: Until You Belong to Me
Author: Cherith
Genre: Horror, Supernatural
Word Count: 11,224
Rating: M
Warnings: religious subversion, something very much like dubcon, femslash, graphic/violent scenes, fire
Summary: Sorrow is a demon trying to get away from her master, and she enlists the help of an old friend. Written as a companion piece to last year's: Blind Denial the Long Way Down (also written for OFBB).

Part One | Part Two

Bonus content:
Mix: Devil's Spoke by inferiarecoming

You guys, the mix that inferiarecoming made is AMAZING. I don't normally faun over fanmixes, but I've been bugging her about it for the last week trying to get across how perfect it is. All the songs, they fit the story, they fit Sorrow, and she does with her mix what I always try to do, by choosing songs that flow together well throughout the mix. I <3 THIS MIX AND YOU SHOULD TOO.

I happen to think it goes well with the story, but my story and I have had many words over the last few months, and they weren't all great. So I'm not going to talk about how much I'd like you to read it. But, if you get nothing else out of this post, check out the mix at least.

OFBB Mix: Another Part of You (Hikikomori)

It's fanmix time again you guys! This mix is for esotaria's originalbigbang story, Hikikomori, which I absolutely loved. It's shadowy and has an adorable and brave main character. I think you'll like it a lot! I had a ton of fun putting this mix together and trying to give it a unique sound. Hopefully people get that from this mix. :D

From the summary:
Nobody has seen the residents of house 409 in three years. The only signs that someone still lives in the house are the pizza deliveries left on the doorstep. Rumor has it that the father had made a deal with the Devil and the Devil had come to collect. Both parents had been killed, they said, and only the daughter was spared. Trapped inside the house, a prisoner of monsters.

I will put up a link as soon as the story is up. The story is over here. Check it out!

Tracklisting behind the cutCollapse )

Download the mix from my site here (right click, save as, please)
Individual songs can be uploaded upon request

I hope people enjoy this, let me know what you think if you listen!

So here's a post I've been meaning to make

Matt and I have decided to move forward with adopting H. We've been talking about it off and on since we got her and realized what a good kid she is. And then we sat down with her about two weekends ago and asked her what her thoughts were on the matter and whether or not she'd be interested. Of course, she is very interested and in fact told us that if we hadn't talked to her about it- she was wanting to bring it up with us soon. So, I think we are all on the same page here. It's an odd adjustment I think to go from taking care of another person's kid, to accepting them as your own. They tell you as Foster Parents to always keep in mind that things can change. A kid might not go back to /their/ parents, but there's always the chance that something will happen and the situation will have to change.

So, to go from that, to the idea that she might be permanent with us. I'm still trying to wrap my head around, while still trying to remember that it might not happen at all. We still have to get our side of things together- mostly paperwork (more paperwork o.0) but anything can still happen. However, we move forward with our plans towards adoption and hope that's the way things work out for us all.

It's continuing to be a difficult adjustment getting used to my new job, time at home with Matt and H, and everything else I want to do. It's getting a little easier to figure out what to do and when, but I know I'm not making everyone happy. I wish I could, and I suspect that if I won the lottery and was home all day, every day, I still wouldn't make everyone happy all the time. But, it hurts not to be able to do everything I can for people now. It's definitely not improving my mood and so I've been doing some things to help with that, in different parts.

I did a little giveaway for my Tumblr followers where I'm putting together some fanmixes. Fanmixes make me incredibly happy and I didn't really participate in any big bang challenges this year (aside from OFBB which is due this weekend - I keep having to remind myself) so I missed out on doing mixes for a lot of things like I did last year. So, this gives me the chance to sort of stretch out my music listening/analysing muscles, which I enjoy immensely.

In general I'm stepping back from fandom over on Tumblr and other places with several things giving me the opportunity to do so. The DA Land community- which I enjoyed a lot, is switching to become a BioWare Land community, which I'm far less interested in. So, that's one way. I'm also with the help of work, not on Tumblr as much- which I feel reminds me too much of high school at times with it's internet wives and constant reblogging memes and general asshattery when it comes to how people treat each other. It's the internet like anywhere else, but in such a condensed setting, I've been letting it get to me, because I LOVE the DA fandom so much. So, that's not only time and energy, but emotion saved.

I've also, in addition to working on fanmixes, been trying to work on my own writing separate from a lot of things. The OFBB helped at first, and then it didn't and now it's sort of helping again as I finish it up finally. I really need little projects to help me focus sometimes. Plus, I've lost my way with some of my original stuff, so I want to get back to it. Though, I'll probably still be working on DA stuff as well- just not as intensely, I think.

While I sort of step away from being active on Tumblr a bunch, I've got a queue a week long (and I'll keep that up) so my blog is active. But, I'm also working on the 30 Day Female Character Meme. I know there's a lot of those 30 day meme's about- but this is the first one I've really wanted to do. It's got a lot of good questions and has helped my analyst brain sort of break down why I like things- and see some patterns in the things I do like. If you want to read it you can see my 30 day tag here.


I said I would post again when the story was over, and today it is.  I posted a big thing over at Tumblr a bit ago and I want to share it here too.  
I’m VERY HAPPY to see this story completed (for now) and have fallen in love with the Teagan / Cauthrien pairing.  

According to our Masterlist (yes, we have a writing masterlist), we started writing this on July 10th of this year.  We posted the first chapter on July 22nd at dearqueen when we had already let the story run away with us a bit and if I remember correctly, we already had five or six chapters worth of it written by then (in the first two weeks, we’d written nearly half of it).  In August, we slowed down a bit and over the other months we had two, two week hiatuses for various reasons, mostly school and work and just brain breaks for other stories.  

We finished writing the whole thing on October 26th and posted the last chapter today, November 4th.  That’s 108 days total for writing the whole thing - about three and a half months.  Our total story word count pre-editing was 118,112 words, edited down to the 99,400 words that finished today.  That’s a little over 1000 words a day - but to be very honest it was more like 5-10k in a day or two and then nothing for several days to a week or more.

This whole thing has been a pretty fantastic experience, and I know we’re both really happy that people like it as much as they do.  If you haven’t read it, now’s the chance, while we take a break to work on other things.  Because THERE WILL BE MORE of these two coming up.  

But, mostly, I’m just completely O.O about this whole thing: in writing something I like so much, writing with Seri whom I love so much, and writing SO MANY WORDS that I know we both feel were just barely edging everything we wanted to write about in WAR.  

All that to say this.  if you have read any part of WAR, THANK YOU.  AND I LOVE YOU.  Just, so much thanks for supporting our crazy story. 

Title: War is Never Cheap Here
Authors: cherith & serindrana
Game: Dragon Age: Origins
Pairing: Bann Teagan/Ser Cauthrien
Series Rating: NC-17/AO
Chapter Rating: T
Series Wordcount: 99,400
Chapter Wordcount: 6,822
Warnings: Problem drinking.
Summary: Bann Teagan has been corresponding on and off with the Lady Cousland for the past eight months; Queen Anora sends her watchdog, the dreaded Ser Cauthrien, to investigate. (Ao3) (FF)
Notes: War is Never Cheap Here will be updating weekly, on Fridays. Projected length is roughly ten to twelve chapters.
Chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

War is Never Cheap Here

I haven't posted about it lately, because there's been so much else going on, but now that we're almost done, I want to remind people it's out there. serindrana and I are *this close* to having "War is Never Cheap Here be finished. We've written chapter 12, it's being edited now and it'll be posted on Friday at dearqueen. This was our first (but not last) actual co-writing fanfiction together project and I'm extremely proud of how it turned out. No lie, I cried a little writing the last chapter. So, here's the most recent info - and if you're Dragon Age inclined, I hope you read it.

Title: War is Never Cheap Here (11/12)
Authors: cherith & serindrana
Game: Dragon Age: Origins
Pairing: Bann Teagan/Ser Cauthrien
Series Rating: NC-17/AO
Chapter Rating: T
Series Wordcount (to date): 90,357
Chapter Wordcount: 8,146
Warnings: Dark. Violence and abduction.
Summary: The butcher's boy returns with the whole story. Cauthrien and Teagan ride south in search of Edlyn, hoping only that they can make it in time. (Ao3) (FF)
Notes: War is Never Cheap Here will be updating weekly, on Fridays. Projected length looking like twelve chapters.

Only one more chapter! This and the next, however, are pretty dark and heavy. Tread lightly.
Chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

The late, late post

So, I wrote something last week and tried to email post, but apparently, that didn't work and the post got lost in the internet ether.

I started my new job two weeks ago, the Tuesday immediately after my last day at CenturyLink, which was a Friday. So, I basically had a three day weekend and then started working somewhere new. The job is pretty great so far, nice people, nice manager, better money. At the moment, it's only a three month contract, but I'm replacing someone who was a full-time employee, and the manager has already said she wants by January, my position to turn into something full-time. So, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for that. Even if that doesn't happen, the experience here - I'm at Blue Cross Blue Shield - is going to be pretty great. In Kansas City specifically, having some sort of medical and/or insurance experience on your resume is a big plus. And, I've gotten at least three calls for different contract jobs since I started this one, which hopefully means there's a demand for people like me and that if I'm looking again in January, I won't be unemployed for long.

The other good news is that since I actually finished my last day of work at CenturyLink, I get paid out my severance package. It wasn't great and had I not found something, it would've only kept us afloat for about two months. But, having found something else right away, I know that we can set that money aside, until I find something we know is a bit more stable. And if I have to be off for a bit between jobs, we'll have that around. I know not everyone has that opportunity, so I'm very grateful for it.

This job does have sort of big restrictions on internet and time, so I've been in the office 5 days a week with only basic email access and whatever I can get to on my phone. In fact, the other day, a guy I work with got yelled at by a manager for even having his email open during the day. So there's a bit of an old company mentality, which I find a little discouraging this day and age. But it's not so horrible, it just takes a little getting used to. It also means, I'm really, really struggling with time management as I adjust to the new job and everything I need/want to get done in a day.

Like, finishing my originalbigbang story which is due soon. The story is /almost/ finished and about half edited. I'm banging my head in frustration at it though, because it's a very different writing style for me, but one I used because I felt it fit the story. Unfortunately, that means editing it has me tearing at my hair a little while I try to figure out what's necessary and what's not. I still also have to write the ending - and since I'm not yet quite sure HOW it ends, that's a problem. *shrugs* Nothing quite like a deadline to get me motivated.

I've got another post I want to do soon since we've had H at our house for two months now. And probably in the next day or so, I'll write something up for the Foster Years blog as well. We've had a few experiences as the honeymoon period wears off that's worth talking about.


Hello Universe

Sometimes, even when you don't think people like you, they surprise you.

Monday, this guy that I used to work with, who got laid off in May, called me. He recently got a job and had been called about a second job that fit the work he and I are used to. He called me to ask if it was something I'd be interesting in, and if he could forward my information on to the guy about the job. Of course, I said yes.

Tuesday afternoon, I went in to talk to the contracting company - just a meet and greet sort of thing. Wednesday morning I had an interview for the job and then during the interview the woman pretty much said, I was hired. Now, she wanted me to start on Monday, but there's some sort of hold up with HR (isn't there always?) and it might be Wednesday or Thursday before I start the job.

But, this is amazing you guys. I can't even... I was always friendly with this ex co-worker, but I wouldn't have called him a friend. And in the same situation, I don't know that I would've done the same thing for him. Maybe I would've, I don't know. But, that he thought of me, and I got this job - it's a three month contract that they want to turn into a full-time employee position by January - and so QUICKLY... it's pretty amazing. I've just been flabbergasted by the whole thing.

But, typically, this is the way I've gotten my jobs. Nothing forever, and then when something comes along, it just happens fast.

Anyway. Today's my last day at my old job. I'm at home doing nothing, because there's not actually work for me to do. I'll go in around 2 this afternoon to turn in my laptop and badge, and clean out my desk. But, I'm not really sad about it. I've been there 7 years, and almost everyone is going away. I've been told it doesn't matter how badly they're going to need me in the coming months, they're not in a place to spend time trying to keep me. That's a pretty good indicator of their level of interest. Most of my friends have gone in previous layoff rounds, so there's little for me there aside from the fact that I like what I do.

My new job will be the same type of work, a little less responsibility and a little more pay. Sounds good to me - even if it's only really good for three months and it doesn't get extended. The only thing I worry about is going from a flexible work-at-home schedule to a full five day a week schedule in an office. The way my sleep habits have been the last year and a half or so, don't give me a lot of confidence, but I'll have to try it. And if it's only for three months, I can make it through that. If it's more, hopefully, I'll learn to adjust.

I've done some things

First things first - my Yahoo email account was hacked. It's an old account and I suppose it had to happen sometime. I've notified customer service and changed the password, but if you got something from me from a yahoo account, I apologize. Hopefully, I'll have it all sorted out here soon.

Now back to the post I started writing yesterday:

Over on Tumblr much like here on LJ, drabble type fanfiction requested by friends/followers whatever has been popular in the Dragon Age fandom (and others I'm sure). I've written a few, but I kept wishing there was more and didn't always want to wait on people to submit requests. So, I talked to martiniphilosph about it and asked if there was a way we could build a little javascript thing that would randomly assign pairings. I gave him a list to start with, he worked up the basic script and then I took it from there.

Yesterday, on Tumblr I tossed out the Dragon Age Random Pairing & Prompt Generator for character and suggestion help and got a pretty overwhelming response all things considered. I'm still adding to it, and making improvements. It's still pretty bare and simple, which is how I like it, though maybe I'll get the interest to actually put up a graphic or something. I've toyed with sticking an ad on it, since I know it's getting a lot of traffic, and I'm a about to be out of a job. But, for fandom, I just feel bad about putting an ad on it.

Anyway, late last night, I threw together a matching generator for Mass Effect though it's much less fleshed out than the Dragon Age one, being so new. Hopefully people will like that one as well.


Things to share: I know I've posted Bo Burnham stuff here before, but he's a comedian I really love. A very smart comedian, despite only being 20 years old. There's an interview with him up on the Nerdist.com that people should check out. Interview here.

It's been a month already?

We've had H for about a month now, which just doesn't nearly seem possible, because things are still going really well. There are signs of settling, we've not had any arguments or major issues, but there has been a bit of boundary pushing. Matt and I have been pretty permissive about things - letting her hang out with new friends, go down to her boyfriend's house, ect. But, a few times we've had to say no, and right now, that hasn't caused any major issues.

We're meeting with both workers (ours and hers) this week, so I'm a little nervous about those, having not had one with either since she came to us. But, I think they'll go well.

*crosses fingers*


PS for KANSAS CITY PEOPLE: This weekend is Bellydancer's Ball. I'll be the MC of the Saturday Night show (as per usual). If you're in the Kansas City area, the show is Saturday night at 7:30pm at the Westport Coffee House Theater and you should come. Tickets are available online at http://bellydancersball2011.eventbrite.com or at the door.


So, serindrana wrote this great story called To Serve the King That's Good and Kind and while she was working on it, I kept coming up with songs that I thought would make a pretty good fanmix. When she finished it, I asked her for any songs she had while working on it, put them with mine and worked up a proper fanmix for it. This is what came out. Mostly it's chronological, but some of them are just sort of themey (totally a word).

If you want to know more about To Serve the King That's Good and Kind you can read it at that link over at AO3. Story summary below, tracklisting and download links behind the cut. Enjoy!

Summary: "He, who had been forced to drag himself along the bottom of society, craved the power she offered him. She, who had lost her ideals and the order of her life, clung to the structure he offered her." Two exiles meet in an Ostwick bar, one full of doubt and another without direction. Post-Origins, Alistair/Cauthrien.

Tracklisting under the cutCollapse )

Download the mix from my site here (right click, save as, please)
Individual songs can be uploaded upon request

Happy Tuesday. I haven't put one of these up in a long time, and I'm super please with how all the music for this turned out, so I hope people like it. It's a fanmix for the story that serindrana and I have been working on. The story is up to chapter 6 (of what we think will be 12) and while we're taking a brief two week break, we decided to put this together. Musically, it's pretty close to what you'd expect of me - a little rock, a little soft and for this one, there's even some sort of dancey tunes mixed in.

If you want to get caught up while we're on a break (just another week) here's the current chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |5 | 6

Tracklisting under the cutCollapse )

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