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and so now...

Now I can't go to sleep. I need to sleep. I know that I have a new job now, but it doesn't start for a few more days, and I still have three days left at Citibank. I was supposed to have been in bed over an hour ago. And now I've laid down, and I had to get back up because I can't sleep. My brain won't shut up.
I'm thinking about him, and about work, and things...and it's just reeling with things that need to be said, or done. Yet it's two in the morning and there's no time for all that.
I made my peace with him this afternoon. I called him. I apologized for letting my pride get the better of me. Because that's what it was. He did what he did out of innocence, out of inexperience. Ironically, although I'm the less experienced one in this relationship, I think he's learning a great deal more than I am. But I didn't say enough today. We only spoke on the phone briefly this afternoon, and now, there's a million other things I need to say to him.
I want to help him understand. Honestly, I want him to know the things that've happened. The reasons behind the reasons. And I want him to know these things, because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he wants to know these things. I can see this. So much to say, and that's why my brain won't keep quiet. But I wish it would, because I'm tired. And I'd like to sleep.

This is a great song. I don't like DMB, but this song, I love.